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I was a medical student. I was frustrated. We were in Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC) having our dinner with my sisters from med school. And we ended up having this awesome pose of “What if I’m mad?” and he was like “Oh my. Here we go again.” Haha.

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He was on his off from working at the bank. He was frustrated. We were celebrating my father’s construction company’s Christmas Party with my family and my dad’s employees. And we ended up having this amazing pose of “What if he’s mad?” and I was like “So? You’re mad? Then what?” Hahaha.

This is so throwback but I love this, literally!

Rumors Has It. ^_^

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Currently, I’m reading a book entitled “What Makes A Winner” written by Whit Criswell, and it is actually a combination of inspiring ideas and principles adapted from the Bible for business and life. For me, it’s more of a “wake-up call book” to call my attention of what I’ve been focusing on with my life and I must commend the author for publishing a book which is worth reading for.

 

Being smart and quite a perfectionist before never gave me a chance to have a lot of real friends. When I was young, I thought it was my problem to be always “misunderstood”, perhaps because I was a bit more tactful and opinionated at a lot of things, and sometimes I was so naive that when I tend to praise people, it comes as something fake or with a hidden agenda. But honestly, it was just a pure compliment that I’m giving to them because I was brought up with the kind of world where you don’t expect people to appreciate you for everything. And I thought that people needs that — an honest compliment, a praise, a commendation or even a thank you. 

As I grow up, I realized that I never have to blame myself for what other people may think of me, but I should always be aware of my actions and my words. The thing is, when I’m not doing anything wrong in my conscience, then there’s nothing to be worried about. Worry, as I’ve learned, is a deal-breaker. I may have been clueless of who my real friends are when I was a growing adolescent, but as I aged and matured, I learned that you cannot please everyone and true friends will be willing to stay with you no matter how many stones people will throw at you.

I’ve been learning that for the past 27 years, and one favorite quote I learned from my MDS sister was “At my age, I already establish the people who stay in my life and the people who will just be passing through”. I finally understood what it meant having to face all kinds of adversity, that yes, in our daily lives, we will meet different types of people with various circumstances, but it will only be up to our choice whether we let them be a blessing to us or a lesson.

The best thing that you have to be wary about is how deep you know yourself as a person. I often ask myself if what I’m doing is worth for my growth as an individual. Will the 10-year older me be happy with the actions of my present me? I re-evaluate often as far as I can to see how I am changing as a person. Will that be even for the better or only for the worse? As to what we have believed that change is inevitable, adapting to it is a must.

Hence, upon facing difficulties, I’ve started anew by letting go of the negative things in my life and realized that there are so much good in this world to begin with. I made this Tumblr account where I kept on posting random things about life and the world as people may have understood it, and upon glancing back to all what I’ve posted, I was happy that my blog is that other part of myself which brings out the good in me. It was like an intangible friend whose words and advices, and photos reflect so much beauty in a person. The life, the dreams, the daily advice – all existed in my blog.

And if I was just another reader, I would have thought that the blogger was indeed an incredible human being who had so much going on with her life, that regardless of her struggles in life, she was that person who’s willing to be a light to others. That’s how I see her blog. That’s how I see my blog. And that’s how I wanted to keep it – good vibes and all.

Write something as if you are talking to yourself. As Whit Criswell explains in his book “My self-talk influences my self esteem. We are constantly talking to ourselves unconsciously.” What we write will always be a reflection of what we are – heart and soul.

As a face is reflected in water, so the heart reflects the real person.

Proverbs 27:19

I learned that being an optimist is seeing that from the hundreds of people I’ve encountered in my life, there was about ¾ of them who’ll always see me as an inspiration, a beautiful person inside out, someone that people would look up to. And rather than focusing on all the negatives, I am starting with what makes my life positive, continuing to be better every day and preparing my soul for the big day when I’ll have a chance to face the Lord and tell Him how I made my journey worthwhile.

Random Thoughts
by Doctor Shei

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My favorite subjects were Science and English but my mom made me bleed just to learn the vowels and the consonants of the English alphabet when I was four.

I must say, I suffered learning the language but I owe it to my mom that I come to love it.

English has always been a part of me, that I was pushed to spelling quiz bees and essay writing contests since elementary and that I was literally devoted into buying notebooks and black pens when I was twelve.

On my first year high, I dedicated my time with writing and reading books authored by Sidney Sheldon and I was amused with how words can deliberately make you feel incredibly intense and happy and shocked at the same time.

On my second year high, I was the only person who claims that my talent was into reciting the poems I wrote, those of which I’ve longed forgotten, that my professor noted of and made me the envy of many by letting me in to our school paper. I was hailed as the youngest editor and my subordinates were my seniors.

I regret it for I kept most of the envelopes of literary works with me. I regret it that I didn’t approve all of the things I’ve read from my fellow students. I regret that I didn’t give them the time to shine because being an editor at that time was my toughest job.

I failed Filipino subject for a while simply because I was more inclined with my second language. It went on for me in college and I thought English was just a favorite. I was surprisingly caught up into a debate team with the absence of my classmate back in fourth year high and was forced to write a script for The Iliad.

I made the best out of me back in high school as a writer, rather than as a speaker, that I ended up starting my blog in Friendster and blogspot, both of which are corrupted now because of password forgetfulness and lost connection. I wrote scripts and stories in my high school career, both ficitional and classroom-related stories (the conversations I usually hear from my friends at the back).

My first job was actually into typing and editing materials. My second job was into writing scripts for events and memorandums. My third job was into listening and talking to foreign people. Without English, I wouldn’t have passed any of the three.

During depressing times, rather than going out and making my life far more miserable than I felt back then, I ventured into blogging and letting all the emotions out. It’s “just” to share people things that you would have told yourself. I made myself a friend upon reading the things I’ve wrote and finally understood what I am a capable of.

The spark that Sidney Sheldon gave me, the crying times I had just to learn English, and the comfort of writing with my own chosen language were the things that made me what I am now.

I realized that being in love with what made you bleed in the first place was the keystone into bringing yourself to new dimensions. My talent was merely a talent until I’ve decided to use them, and there, I found myself writing again, reading again and listening to myself as I spoke of my favorite subject.

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Advice: The things you like, share and post will always be a reflection of your thoughts and a gateway of your emotions. Bring out what’s positive in you and people will follow you for it.

Random Thoughts by Doctor Shei

“i am born to conquer, to lead, to rule and yet, i choose to be conquered, to serve and to follow.”

  • I got this from a Personality Test site: http://www.quizbox.com/personality which is actually a helpful tool to explore yourself a little deeper. Why don’t you try it out for yourself?  Read ahead to know more of me.


♫Something To Share♫

(*Got this from a Personality Test*.. Really Nice and So True! Love it!♥)

♦Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

♦The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

♦Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

♦The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that’s why you’ll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that’s why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don’t just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person’s personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn’t meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.

♦Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

♦The right job for you:

You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don’t focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

♦How do you view success:

You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

♦What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

♦Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

♥Kind and Gentle♥

Your kindness is your charm – you are also gentle and sweet. Everybody likes to be around people with your personality. Like a psychologist, people like to talk to you to discuss their problems because you are proper and discrete, as well as confident. You look mature and people respect you. People with this kind of character are few and far between.

♥The Mass Communicator♥

You have a cheerful personality and you are a naturally kind person. Your hidden talent isn’t really that hidden at all: you shine among a crowd. You would make an ideal news announcer, flight attendant or model – any position that would give you an opportunity to deal with plenty of people. A tip for you is to avoid getting too deeply involved in others’ personal lives – otherwise you might find yourself constantly being asked for help.

♥My Dream Guy (daw… ehem!)♥

Unlike most others, he walk on his own path. He’s creative and willing to learn about anything. Music and movies are his favorites. He’s kind to everyone. You can feel his inner beauty through his words. He’s comfortable among a circle of friends. He’s looking for someone to share his hobbies.

♥Looking To The Future♥

Your future friend: You have a big sister confidence and leadership. So you friends are mostly vulnerable and always need your help. You can’t resist helping these people and eventually you all will become good friends.

Your travel plan: In the future, you will often take overseas trips especially to modernized countries. You will get to explore Europe and North Asia like you always wanted.

Your future financial status: You are very good at saving and sometimes you are even stingy. The reason you want your teeth to grow longer is because when you can’t eat, you can save even more on food. Once your money is deposited in the bank, there’s no way that you will withdraw it out just to spend on luxuries.

The last period of your life: You can’t stand being a lonely old lady so you will spend the last days of you life being a kind loving grandparent so that the kids will love to have you around.

♥Love and Marriage♥

♦A kind of person you will be attracted to in a real life situation is those who are unbridled and free.

♦In the process of courtship, the approach that makes you feel irresistible is being straightforward, and having your partner speak directly.

♦The impression you’d like to give to your lover is stylish.

♦One reason that would make you break up with your partner is his or her being ruthless, cold-blooded or ironic.

♦The kind of relationship you’d like to build with your partner is that you care not only about the present but also the future with your partner. A long-lasting relationship that you can grow with is important.

♦Would you commit adultery? Society and morality worry you. You wouldn’t do anything wrong after marriage.

♦About marriage, you think marriage is a precious thing. Once you get married, you’ll treasure your partner very much.

♦About love, at this moment, you always thirst for love. You will do anything for it, but you don’t fall in love easily.

“ay oo nga pala, i’m using eye cream pag puyat ako, nag night out kasi kami, ikaw ba gano kadalas ka magkarun ng social life? i bet super madalang, obvious naman eh.”

~Miss Bluetears

This was a comment from a 26-year-old mother of 1 child, G1P0, with an initials of J.S.A. as a reply to me when I called the attention of her darkening eyebags. I must admit, I should have ignored it instead, but sometimes, you have to give those bashers a taste of their own mockery. Again, if we want honesty then let’s just be honest with ourselves.

This article was not meant to offend her more, but rather to ponder with the thoughts of night life or social life for me as a medical student, a doctor-on-duty and an aspiring physician.

Well, to be honest, I don’t have a night life if it means to drink all night or to go out everyday with your friends late at night and drink until you get sober. No, I wasn’t brought up that way.

The kind of night life I have were actually of occasional drinking sessions with my colleagues (interns and batchmates) where I get to eat all their food while they spend their time drinking all those tequila and vodka.

The kind of night life I have were the ones I spend with seeing different types of people – old and young, employees and unemployed, the sick and the attention-seeker, while asking the favorite question of “What is your reason for consult?” and to add up with “How I can help you?”.

There’s this one particular episode when I was the only Medicine intern in the ER while my partner was busy finishing our daily census. A 22-year-old female patient came in, lethargic and was under the influence of alcohol. Astounded upon seeing her, her relative informed that she had a history of “Hypokalemia” and was ordering me to give her a dose of KCl (Potassium Chloride).

She happened to be on a drinking session on the wee hours around 2AM while during that time, I was half-asleep, waiting if any toxic patients would come in. Yes, I lack sleep and that was particularly the very reason why I was surprised.

Being the captain-of-the-ship that time in the ER, I had no choice but to take command. The first thing I had in mind after taking the history and physical examination was to conduct laboratory work-ups first. Noted that she had a history of Hypokalemia will not be enough to support that her underlying condition as of that moment was what her relative is claiming. So, to cut it short, I requested all the labs needed including Serum Electrolytes, Hgt and ECG, and waited for the results.

I informed the relatives that I cannot give them the KCl that they were requesting because I had a suspicion that it was more of the alcohol that causes her to get a little drowsy rather than her acclaimed electrolyte imbalance. I also went up to see my senior from the ICU to inform him how I go about in facing that patient, and my laboratory work-ups happened to be correct.

True enough, when the results came, everything was normal. And after like 30 minutes, the patient was suddenly okay and was surprisingly cooperative (Initially, she was irritated, cursing me and ordering me to give her KCl).

So there, after she got all her senses into places, I get to tell her if she was a responsible mother (because she was also G1P0 and she was forcing me earlier to give the drug so that they can go back home and tend to her child’s needs), she wouldn’t have been in that drinking session at all. She wouldn’t have leave her child and worry afterwards while shouting to all nurses and to me because she’s in the hospital.

I advised her like a teacher to her student, in a most professional and comforting way, in a way that people would want to listen rather than to smack your face. And thank God, she nodded and apologized to me for what she had done earlier, and I smiled back.

That’s practically one of my unforgettable experiences as a medical intern. That was like 7 months ago and the very highlights of the story was still fresh in my memory because if I will only follow without thinking then I would not have managed that patient properly.

So there you have it. We spoke of night life and social life. And I was thinking, if I was not doing my job, patients coming in to ER due to vehicular accidents, sudden seizure attacks and the like would not have been treated properly. In conjunction with that, if you tend to spend your every night with drinking sessions and your so-called night life, then perhaps you would have been a doctor’s patient. Someone like me, even if half-asleep, hopefully will manage you properly.

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So this picture of mine was a from-duty status. And as you can see, my hair was a bit curly because later that night, I was on braids, courtesy of my clerk while we were enjoying eating our snacks.

Night life and social life,we do have that but there’s always a time for everything. Sometimes, we need to make sacrifices for the greater good and for a bigger future, for our dreams, for the doctors.

Our job may have been toxic and challenging but we enjoy it. It’s up to you whether you’ll enjoy what you have and make use of your time wisely.

For insulting what we do, thank you. Just remember, when you were hospitalized and when you delivered your baby, that doctor who attended to you was also sacrificing a night of her life to save you.

Random Thoughts by Doctor Shei

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Favorite Line of the Day:

I’m a very busy woman (yet still have time to blog).

No matter how hectic my schedule is, I always find time to write something that would, at least, alleviate my tension headaches (after having been exposed with long periods of time in front of the laptop studying and making presentations).

Tagged as the “Powerpoint Queen” of my batch (in the College of Medicine), it had occurred to me that this skill of creating powerpoint presentations were either a blessing and a curse. But nonetheless, I’m taking this as a challenge and as a learning experience.

My seniors would always pull me out or request to make powerpoint or slideshows for them during my tour of duty. Sometimes, I get to eat free meals. Sometimes, I get to be excused on duty hours. Sometimes, I get to be paid. But most of the time, it’s all for free and I get to learn the challenges of what being a senior doctor is (for future purposes).

Sometimes, I get to love it and sometimes, I’d like to be tired because I’m also human. But come to think of it, the mere fact that people rely and depend on me for such a skill is something to be thankful for and cherish, because God was so good, He gave me such talent.

The only thing that keeps me going no matter how blurred my vision was on the wee hours of morning, while I’m still busy making presentations and studying stuffs was the fact someone out there was hoping for my help. And with that, I push myself more because I never wanted to fail someone or anyone for that matter.

I am just happy to be needed. Sometimes, knowing your purpose is what keeps your life going.

If I’m bound to help people for the longest time, then so be it, because that’s my calling. I hope we’ll all find why we’re made for.

Random Thoughts by Doctor Shei

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I wish I had all the time in the world to write my thoughts and reblog all the things which I think will also make everyone less bored, the way I was back when I had to kill time for a while. But I was as busy as anyone else, or probably drained from the realms of my med life, that I had to put my phone down and leave the internet alone for quite some time because there are people who needs my hands out of the keyboard, from the social media, and back to those who perpetually ask of how I can be of help with my hands and eyes all focus on them. Nonetheless, I’d like to thank everyone who liked, reblogged, and followed my post and me, unexpectedly. Thank you to the studyblrs, and those who share the same passion as I do!

As any blogger or aspiring doctor, I’d like to share a famous line made popular by my senior who never quits her residency in spite of all the crying times she went through, this goes for those who aspires to become better with what they do:

“Happy to Serve”

For the people who bully you,

The power trippers,

The clients who shouts at you,

And who triumphs for your mishaps,

For the crying babies,

The needy, old men,

And those whose eyes could almost tear your flesh,

Happy To Serve!

You’re here because you are blessed.

And being blessed is having a purpose in life.

At times you go blind,

And could not find a way,

Remember that there is someone watching you from above.

Bless you, dear soul.

And may our endeavors grow.

Let us continue to do what we love to do the same way we’ll gasp without air to breathe, and our efforts will pay off soon than what we expected. For valuing my post and appreciating my tagline, thank you!

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Looking forward for more Likes, Reblogs and Follows. Follow me at Little Doctors – Tumblr for my random posts. Thanks so much!

Doctor Shei, Little Doctors

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Being a doctor imposes me to be a lot more understanding and patient to my patients. Embracing the “white coat reality” and facing different types of people everyday challenges me to become a real professional. But somehow, it doesn’t end with the clinic hours or the hospital duties. Sometimes, when you go out or dig into your laptop, you cannot take away the fact that you are always in a mission and there’s always an opportunity knocking on your door to remain calm and humble, in spite of people trying to mess your life.

As Spiderman says, with great power comes great responsibility. If I wasn’t in this profession, I wouldn’t grasped the very idea of being selfless in helping others. I came to realize that my family will not only be my patients but all of people that God would want me to meet – “new relatives”, old friends, enemies, strangers, criminals and even terrorists. The numbers are limitless and anyone of them, if God allows, can be your patients, or should I say, my patients.

I never get to understand what being a doctor means if I didn’t become that sleepless clerk who was clueless in adjusting herself with the toxic duties in the hospital, or the intern who was often misjudged by her juniors, or if I didn’t observe the resident who was expected to know more than that of a clerk and intern, slaved all throughout by her bosses, and the consultant who was given that greater responsibility of handling the very lives of their patients, the ones who delivers both the good and the bad news.

My profession, our profession, in one word would be challenging. The same manner that I’ve posted this quote as the title: “Can’t you find anything to do with your life that you keep messing up with mine?” This is actually a cry from a human heart who was gravely insulted for the longest of time, but upon reflecting with everything that’s going on through my life right now, that was a blow to my face to remind me that I am not just anybody. I am the change I wanted to be.

I should have been more thankful that there are people trying to mess up with my life because it’s something that I could literally be proud of, not because it’s perfect but because in spite of the downfalls, there’s that struggle that continue to co-exist for survival.

My parents were my first patients and I wanted them to live longer, and everyday I stay in the hospital or meet people in the clinics for consultations, I do not see a stranger’s face. What I touch and what I see are the faces of my parents who were asking for my help. And my parents were not always in a good mood and they’re not always easy to deal with. They’re struggling as I am, the same way patients are struggling into telling what they feel. And just by understanding those concepts, no matter how many shouts or insults or bashers you’ll have in life, you are still blessed, because you know better.

Yes, we are all struggling to be more kind and more loving and more understanding to people. It’s difficult. It’s challenging. It’s everything. We are only human. But if we found that stair into the change that we wanted to be, then there’s no reason for us not to take that. We are always given a choice for ourselves, whether to stay in the darkness or find the light in it.

To help people, we must be more compassionate and understanding. And so I end my random thoughts with thank you and I am sorry for having bothered you to read this lengthy message or browse most of the things I love to share. I just wanted to let you know that life is beautiful no matter how bad the situation was. Yours is beautiful and I hope you know that and you find more ways to improve yourself the way I do.

I am just blogging and this is my life, and nothing about it was meant to hurt or insult anyone else for that matter. Like my own personal taglines: “This is my world. You’re free to go in. Just spare me with your cruelty,” and “Doctors Don’t Just Save Lives. They Touch People’s Lives”, I am by all means here to inspire people. May you also find my words inspiring instead of throwing it all to yourself in a negative way.

From learning the mistakes of the past, let’s continue to share things that will uplift a person, that will make you understand a person rather than hurt a person’s feelings.

Thank you.

-Random Thoughts by Doctor Shei-

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You cannot take away that dream you had when you were just a young kid and the teacher asked you to draw what you want to become, and you draw a person with the hospital on her background, and that she was carrying a stethoscope.

You cannot just take away that kind of dream when you’re in love with delivering your dog’s puppies, identifying their gender and taking good care of them while they were young.

You can’t stop dreaming especially when most of the blood-bursting experiments where handled by your own dirty hands and even if you are afraid of frogs, you didn’t mind because the study of life for you is fun, and science exhibits, though it makes you a geek, will always be your favorite club.

You cannot just let go of that dream when you wanted to take Biology, and your parents asked you to take Nursing because you failed their expectations, and in spite of that, you found it interesting and an opportunity to be in the hospital, to study anatomy and to know better of human illness.

You cannot stop dreaming that in spite of being a professional, you want to understand how the doctor’s orders were made, what was the concept behind it and wonder why your handwriting was similar to those you read in the charts.

And then, you decided to pursue your Medicine career, which you thought was such the noblest of everything there is to seek. You found that people literally depends on you. Those people whom you call family, your friends, your friends of friends, your network – all of them will start listening to you because you are what you dream of becoming.

At last, you start dreaming again of continuing that dream, because being a doctor takes guts. It will always be a difficult journey and there will never be an easy way out, but God chose you as His instrument.

So don’t stop dreaming because along that long, curvy road filled with stones, thorns and crawling insects, there’s a place at the end of the line in which you are called a “Doctor”, not just because you earned the degree but because you understand that you don’t just save lives. You touch people’s lives.

-Little Doctors

Born as a “homebody” as my zodiac dictates, I miss home and the times I get to clean and redecorate my room, find old stuffs from the past, wake up late and sleep whenever I wanted, watch television until the wee hours of morning, eat whatever there is in the fridge, and be merry. 😌

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But my life, the way I chose it, was more of those stolen moments — when I get to live in the outside world and build families among people not related to me by blood; Those times that being at home is something I appreciate more and more each day cause I’ll never get to stay there most of the time.

I have a high respect for the “housewife” but my world as I see it now will never be the one that my mom chose for herself. I understand her in all those awkward loving she’s giving us, and how she wakes up early in the morning to prepare breakfast and sleep so late because she has to wait for each one of us to be in bed. I love her in spite of those times I had to sit for four long hours listening to her before I leave for school or those moments when she argue with us for all sort of things. I’ve seen her doing the toughest job among us and I envy her sometimes because she got to live her own schedule the way she wanted.

But that’s life. That’s how her routine lasted for 25 years and I love her for being the best mother and a full-time housewife to my dad. Through her, I get to see what I wanted — to be a lot less dramatically insane outside.

We choose our lives. It’s your choice whether to be happy with the choices you’ve made.

In Tagalog, “Ginusto mo yan kaya panindigan mo.”